Being Still

Oftentimes in life, we are placed in a situation that forces us to move in some way--whether that's physically, emotionally, mentally, psychologically. Usually, these "pressure points" of life are challenges that we must figure out how to overcome, or change, or lighten.

Many times, these points can be things like the death of a family member, a geographical move brought on by a new job, losing a friendship or relationship, or even a conviction that pushes us into change.

I've been doing a lot of thinking on these types of life moves and, more so, on things that I wish I had moved about myself a long time ago. Things that I wish I would have been able to figure out or fix or stop long before they were actually figured out or fixed or stopped. 

But what about the times when we're meant to not move? The times when we're meant to stay exactly where we are, right then, and just be still?

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

Being still is much harder to do than to say. Trust me. I spent six years trying to move something that didn't want moved. And, as much as I tried to figure out how to move this thing, nothing I did worked. I never got the answers. I never got the satisfaction. In fact, this thing regressed. It pushed back, and hard, and I was doing all I could to find sure footing to brace myself against its incredible force. 

And, I still never won. Not in the slightest. In fact, I was pushed down, battered up, worn out, and didn't recognize myself in the mirror. (Have you ever walked by your reflection and it literally stopped you in your tracks because you wondered who that person was in the mirror staring back at you?)

Then one day, after six and a half years of struggle, I stopped. I just quit. I didn't try to force answers to questions I knew were correct. I didn't push to figure out why things were the way they were. I just stood still and observed. I waited, patiently, and took everything in.

When I did this, I started noticing things, like inconsistencies in stories, differences in behavior I'd not really noticed before, and weird things that just raised all kinds of red flags. And, when I started taking account of these things I was starting to notice, I realized that I'd seen all these things before. The only difference this time, though, was that I wasn't trying to save the situation. I wasn't trying to fix things. I wasn't trying to change something. I was just letting it be... letting the situations play out how they were going to play out.

And, boy... did they play out. But that's a different story for a different day.

Point being--I learned more in the two months that I was still than in the six and a half years that I tried to force change. In those times when I just sat back (and, sometimes, that was literally) and watched and listened, with no judgement or action needed, I became enlightened to a situation that was right in the front of my face, despite me not being able to actually see it. I was always trying to look past it; looking it in the eye was too scary for me.

If you have situations in your life where you're struggling--times of frustration where nothing you seem to do is working--just stop and wait. Wait in the stillness. Listen in the stillness. You'll learn so much more in the quiet than you do in the chaos.

XOXO